fighting for peace

Evan: "Here's what a hippie-crite says: 'If you don't use non-violent methods, I'll kill you.'"

noise complaint

Evan: "Will you please make Sage stop singing not-very-good gibberish?"

the most dangerous game

Evan: "If I score a goal on a header, you're going to have a smile so big it's going to split your face."

the trouble with self-evaluations

"It's perfectly perfect." —Sage, when asked to assess the job she'd done cleaning her room.

keeping up our front

Evan: "Man, Sage left crud all over this front porch."

Eric: "She certainly did."

Evan: "You should tell her that any toys she leaves out on the porch are going to get thrown away."

Eric: "I'm not sure you should be talking. You leave stuff lying around all the time."

Evan: "Yeah, but I leave it lying around inside, not out here where all of society can see it."

i believe him

Eric: "Did you shampoo, Evan?"

Evan: "Yes, with Ocean Breeze shampoo scented with sea algae extract."

and he approved this message

Evan (overheard playing with Legos by himself): "So today, kids, we learned a valuable lesson: Always wear pants." "That's a totally worthless lesson!" "Fine. Today we learned a valuable lesson: You should never travel through other dimensions. But if you do, always make sure to improve a dimension before you leave it."