Saturday, February 28, 2009

fair point

Evan: "What are They Might be Giants?"

Eric: "That's the name of a band."

Evan: "Oh. It's not a very good name."

Eric: "Why not?"

Evan: "Well you can't really suspect someone of being a giant."

Save the Effelants

When Sage says the word "elephant," she always flips the first two consonant sounds, "effelant." She probably does it because she's familiar with the "Heffalump," an elephant-like creature dreamt up by A.A. Milne. Sage spends her weekdays in the Heffalump Room at her day care. But it's not the only word whose consonants she transposes — for a long time she said "shiff" instead of "fish." And she recently used "frelection" for "reflection." Anyway, today she said "elephant" correctly for the first time. And it made me sad.

Saturday, February 21, 2009

soap du jour

Sage just came into the back yard, where Sonja and I were working, and said, "I tried to eat some tasty bread, but it didn't taste good to me." She was spitting and wiping her mouth. I asked to see the bread, and she led me into the house and showed me a bar of homemade oatmeal soap with a bite taken out of it.

Thursday, February 19, 2009

one more...

"Which of these names do you like better—
Jehoshaphat or Itchy Sweater?"
said Evan. "For yourself, I mean."
"That isn't much to choose between,"
I said. "I think I'll keep my name."
"No, pick!" he said. "It's just a game."
"Okay, I'll take Jehoshaphat."
"Why would you want a name like that?"

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

got more rhymes

"It might work with a panther," Evan said,
"but if you see a vulture, don't play dead."

***

"I think there ought to be a guy
with X-ray vision in one eye,"
Evan suggested, "who can swallow
top-secret files because he's hollow,
except that he contains a motor
that turns a helicopter rotor
that's where his shoulder blade should be,
and who speaks penguin, and who's me."

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Is it too late to pick Sid?

Evan: "Would you like to be named Sid?"

Eric: "No."

Evan: "Would you rather be named Sid or Sweetie-Pie Donut Lover?"

Eric: "Sid."

Evan: "Why?"

Eric: "Because being named Sweetie-Pie Donut Lover would be a source of grief every single day."

Evan: "Would you rather be named Balloonface or Floor-Crawler?"

Eric: "Umm... I think I'd rather just be nameless."

Evan: "That's not a choice. Would you rather be Balloonface or Floor-Crawler?"

Eric: "I don't know, Evan. Floor-Crawler, I guess."

Evan: "Why would you want a name like Floor-Crawler?"

Sunday, February 15, 2009

think fast

Evan: "That would be funny if you saw a caterpillar on the highway, going REALLY fast. And you said, 'Oh! No wonder caterpillars always seem so slow! I never see them on the highway!'"

Saturday, February 14, 2009

the waiting is the hardest part

Evan: "Can I eat my Laffy Taffy?"

Eric (in bed): "Evan, you can't have candy at 7:30 in the morning. You can eat your Laffy Taffy after you've had a good supper."

Evan: "Well can I have supper now?"

Saturday, February 7, 2009

wait for it...

Evan: "It would be cool if there was a real guy who was mechanical and had all kinds of devices that could come out of him, like Inspector Gadget, and all kinds of special capabilities. And who was me."

Thursday, February 5, 2009

will do

Evan: "If you ever see me on the View Ridge Playfield at night with a great big gas can and a great big rock, you'd better find out what I'm up to."