catastrophic health insurance

Eric: "If you could be any kind of animal, what would you be?"

Evan: "A rat."

Eric: "Really? A rat?"

Evan: "Yeah, or a cockroach."

Eric: "Why would you want to be a cockroach?"

Evan: "Because I could live for ten days with my head cut off."

When Eric does his Harry Potter voice...

Evan: "You sound more like C-3PO."

attention PBS...

"There should be a show called 'This Old Army Tank'."

Evan's survival tip of the day

"If you see a vulture, don't play dead."

not just desserts

Evan: "Would that be funny if a bad guy got a bunch of sandwiches thrown at him?"

silent night

So tonight we returned the favor and took the neighbors' kids. I know it's wrong to let the DVD player do all the baby-sitting for you, but man, we fired up "Monsters Inc." and in 20 seconds they went from destroying our house to...

bless 'em

Tonight we had a neighbor from up the street baby-sitting the kids. Her own children are, apparently, a challenge to put to bed. When we got home, we thanked her for giving us the night off, and she thanked us for the same thing. Her description of Evan and Sage's bedtime: "I put Sage in her crib and she asked for a book. So I gave her one and she 'read' for a few minutes, then fell asleep. Evan danced around the house for a while, taking off his clothes. Then he put on his pajamas, got into bed and asked me to sing him a lullaby. I did that, and he said, 'Thank you. Goodnight.' And I said, 'That's it?!'"

bad example

Evan: "Horns and harmonicas are dirty instruments. That's what I call them."

Eric: "Why do you call them 'dirty instruments'?"

Evan: "You play them with your mouth, and that gets lots of germs on them."

Eric: "Well, they're no dirtier than cups or glasses that you drink out of. You put your mouth on those, too, but you don't call them 'dirty dishes'."

Evan: "Yes you do."

Eric: "Oh yeah."

cat fancy

This morning Sonja put Sage's hair in pigtails and pinned her bangs back with a barrette, then told her how cute she looked. Sage was extremely proud, and went running into the living room where the cat was sleeping, announcing that she was going to "go show Franklin."

aspirations

Some of you parents out there will recognize this as an aspirator — used to clear the nasal passages of infants and toddlers who are stuffed up, as Sage has been for much of the winter. Why have I posted a picture of it? To share the new name Evan has given it: "the hot-snot balloon."

I will admit that this is in poor taste if you will admit that my son is a genius.

Presenting the X-STAR 2008

Evan's new robot: